Failed eBay Purchases

I apologize, it has been a while. I cannot say I have been particularly busy.

I am going to highlight some recent failed eBay purchases. I have a long and storied history with eBay. There have been good times, and there have been very very bad times.

Failed Item For 8/29/06:

Now I'm not sure exactly what I was thinking when I bid on this. Am I harboring a secret desire to be some sort of sexy referee? I paid $9.99 for this fashion abomination. Now, it wouldn't be so bad if it fit me like it does on the mannequin. The ad said, and I quote, "It seems to melt to your body for the perfect sexy fit!" This is a lie. It clings to my bosoms nicely (as most things/people are compelled to do.), but it droops about my waist making it look slightly reminiscent to Richard Nixon's jowls.

I guess I could always "Cinch it."


Ah well, thems the breaks, right?. I am more than positive there will be more failed eBay purchases in the future. I will keep you choads updated.

Best Print Ads EVER.

These are print ads for Chopstix. You can't read it, but it says, "Can't hate everything."

Who are the ad wizards that came up with this? They are geniuses. GENIUSES I TELL YOU!

HMMPH!

I don't care. I'm still in love with this man.

Sigh

I resisted as long as I could. Really I did. But I am now the owner of three pairs of skinny jeans. 3 Dammit! This makes me unhappy on several different levels. How could I be so weak? I was the loudest contester of these jeans for quite a while.

They only look good on tall skinny girls. They make your legs looks short and stubby. They are too trendy, they will be out of fashion in a New York minute. They are too eighties! YUCK!

These are all things that I have said repeatedly. But then I went to Hem. Hem is a jeans mecca. It is the most wonderful store I have ever been to. The ladies that own it are just so lovely, and so helpful, you'd feel guilty if you didn't buy anything. I guarantee there is a pair of jeans at Hem that will make your life complete. I am warning you now though, You have to be prepared to spend a fair amount of cash to get the perfect pair of jeans. Luckily, I was with my sister ("Spend" is her mantra) and my birthday was right around the corner. Anyway, so I am this magic store and I spy a shelf of skinny jeans. I say, "What the fuck, I'm going to try some on." I grab a pair of People's Liberation jeans, try them on and lo and behold; It's like a revelation. The stupid skinny jeans look AMAZING. My legs, rather than looking short and stubby, look loooong and streamlined. My ass (not that it needed any help) looked phenomenal! From then on, I was fucking hooked. I went to Target and bought some on sale for 12.99. Then yesterday I went to Old Navy and bought these for 25 bucks. I feel like a phony. But I still have convictions. I draw the line at leggings or dresses over pants.


And hey, at least I'm not wearing gauchos.